Hard Times

Times have been hard here. We, like many other Americans, are in danger of losing our home to foreclosure. The economy is so bad and work has been so slow that we've been barely scraping by.
The Salvation Army has helped us with food, and for that I am extremely grateful. We were lucky enough that Hubby has sleep apnea, or else we'd have no electricity now; we got a medical extension.
I've been so depressed I've tried to fall off the face of the Earth. I haven't blogged, I haven't really done much of anything other than clean and zone out with a computer role playing game.
You know, they say that there is help out there for families like mine who work hard and try our damndest. I've found this isn't so.
I spent days on the phone with dozens of different programs to try to avoid foreclosure. We've tried working with our mortgage company to try loss mitigation options. I've tried calling THAW and United Way for help with our heating and electricity bill. There are no funds left in that program.
Many programs are running very thin. Apparently things aren't just terrible for my family; it's like this all over the place. We are also unlucky enough to live in Michigan, close to Detriot; in this area things are pretty much as desperate as they get.
We thrive on the auto industry, which is not doing so hot. Jobs here depend on the big three, and they are laying off.
I've even tried to get food stamp help and State Emergancy Relief. I went to the Department of Human Services, waited about four and a half hours, and was yelled at by my case worker. I had filled out the form for emergancy help for our mortgage, and this worker told me that the state dosn't care if we lose our house. She continued her rant by saying that we never should have gotten our house in the first place; people like us don't own houses. I left the office, got into my van, and cried for ten minutes before leaving the parking lot. I felt horrible.
Now, we are not the sort of people who live on welfare. We don't try to take advantage of the system, we want to leave food stamps and assistance for the people who really need it... But, when we really needed it, we were met with condemnation. I was made to feel like a bum.
My husband and I are hard workers; he drives his truck many hours, and sacrifices time with his family to get things where they need to go. He misses parts of his children's lives so he can support us. I try to raise responsible, caring boys who not only respect others but have compassion, empathy, and love..
It seems in this world the people who try the least and put in the smallest amount of work are the ones to get the most help.
I'd like to end this entry by saying things are looking up. I'd like to tell you that our mortgage is paid, our electricity bill is covered, and that our refrigerator is stocked. I'd like to tell you these things but I cannot.
The only thing I can tell you is that I am trying to stop isolating. I have been reaching out to friends so that I don't go slowly insane like I have been. I have been trying to spend time with other adults to maybe ease my mind just a little bit and not cry my eyes out every day. In that respect, things are getting better.
I wish I had something positive to say to end this with, but the sad truth is this: I can't. We're trying to keep our head above water and failing miserably. It sucks. And it honestly makes me feel worse to know that we are not the only family going through this.